L Scully

I think I’m really hoping to get the hope back

I
Confession: I am the hero of my life.
A child screams COOKIE MONSTER and I turn
to look at him as though it’s my name.
Words mean nothing. Even nothing means nothing.
It’s a sunny day in this male-dominated field.
The warplane overhead becomes a neon
hallway, and then a light rain, and then guilt.
All my ghosts are in the present tense.
I pull you out of my underwear to fight
about the role of pigs on the farm.
I’m the pig, you’re the farm. Obsession is my cheat code.
If I ever hurt someone, God, let it be
a man. Points for aspirational charity.
Only selfish guys answer to COOKIE.

II
Everyone’s renaming themselves. But me,
I’m taking the letters out. Let’s go out
to eat every day until we die. Order
a too-spicy Brazilian mocha.
Therapy-speak girlfriends are still people,
even the vegetarian ones.
Things that are unethical include
asking for medical advice on Reddit
and the arguments for kidfluencing.
Anyone in a tie could be Mormon
and anyone in a helmet could be
disguising a hole. Rich women whisper.
Film experiment: blank screen, ninety minutes,
at the end it says, Based on true events.

divorce is a type of wedding

your journal is a fortune cookie,
old wisdoms tucked under your arm.
never go to Worcester on your day off.
distance is a matter of how fast you walk.
the mechanics of a horse making milk.
doesn’t anyone meet in real life anymore?
we could be more than us. I’m me and
you’re some guy yelling out the car window.
cat calls are sonnets if you’re lonely enough.
I want big American skateboard arms.
if you add an “E” to improv you get
my self-improvement kink.
kiss me as someone with no dog.
we don’t have to guess,
there are tests for that.

front of house

I get free coffee because I am crying.
My whole life’s a library because I am borrowing.
Every place I leave smells like rotten oranges.

Joan says poems should be like angel sex,
and that all English teachers are fags.
She’s a girl who understands things.
The women behind the bar are kissing.

I think girls talk a lot. They snap their fingers.
Compare permacultures. Recommend suppositories
and the movie Taxi Driver. Sometimes they even pay for my coffee.

L Scully is a living writer. Their second book, SELF-ROMANCING (Dopamine Books LA) will be released September 9th. They are the co-founder of Stone of Madness Press and direct [Working Title], a queer New England literary series. They visit Emily Dickinson's grave twice a week. Love notes can be sent to their Instagram, @_caprihorny_ and official business can be conducted at lscully.com.